A love story always will have some pain advocate.com Take a look at an interesting article we found.
Waiting for the Ides of March deccanherald.com Take a look at an interesting article we found.
Gender-bending, modern Caesar chronicleherald.ca Take a look at an interesting article we found.
March 15, 2010
Perhaps the most famous three words uttered in literature:
"Et tu, Brute?"
On this date, in 44 BC, Julius Caesar took his last breath.
Murdered at the hands of a conspiracy.
But what was the most unkindest cut of all is that his dear friend, Marcus Brutus, led the conspiracy.
Okay, maybe Caesar didn’t say those words exactly.
If you don’t give Shakespeare poetic license, whom can you give it to?
From his play," Julius Caesar,” Caesar begins to resist the attack but resigns himself to his fate when he sees that his close friend is among the plotters:
Caesar: Doth not Brutus bootless kneel?
Casca: Speak, hands, for me! [They stab Caesar.]
Caesar: Et tu, Brute?
There's the crux; those are the only words that Caesar speaks in his native tongue.
Even in the modern, plain-clothes version.
Personal betrayal.
Is there any feeling more difficult to live with?
Benedict Arnold only betrayed his country, but a frenemy stealing your secret recipe for a cookbook and failing to give you credit, well, that hits home.
A bit over the top, but to playwright, Steven Deitz, betrayal, from Old French "trair," from Latin "trdere," is clearly a fate that has no equal:
"One should rather die than be betrayed. There is no deceit in death. It delivers precisely what it has promised.
Betrayal, though... betrayal is the willful slaughter of hope."
With friendship dead, what else did Caesar have to live for?
It's no secret that the greater the trust you have put in the other person; the greater the impact their betrayal has on you.
Crystal Parikh, professor of social analysis, New York University:
"...Something profound happens in the heart of the betrayed person. It is not simply that someone has let you down, or 'double-crossed you. Rather, the betrayer has done an action or taken special information and used it to harm you."
The soothsayer's warning to Julius Caesar, "Beware the Ides of March," has imparted that date with a sense of foreboding.
But, in Roman times, the expression did not necessarily evoke a dark mood—it was simply the standard way of saying, "March 15," when bills were due.
Which was the date, incidentally, when our Income Tax was due until 1955 when it was changed to April 15.
But I doth digress.
Another famous dramatist (being betrayed seems a prerequisite to being one),Tennessee Williams said:
"We have to distrust each other. It is our only defense against betrayal."
Is it?
I'm sure you won't betray my confidence in getting to the heart of the matter.
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Memories of Sexual Betrayal richardgartner.com Take a look at an interesting article we found.
Dealing with Betrayal - Friendship bukisa.com Take a look at an interesting article we found.
Great Betrayals in History thinkquest.org Take a look at an interesting article we found.
still thinking about today...
Betrayal is the cruelest form of anger toward another.......I think I will go sailing where I can throw disappointment overboard!
If only our enemies stabbed us in the back there would be no betrayal. Ironic that only our friends can pull off betrayal. Family can also perform the same duties if allowed. Given that the preceding is true, then Tennessee Williams has it right. Trust is the weak link in the chain of social existance. If one doesn't trust then there can be NO betrayal. A sad state of affairs to be sure...trust, get betrayed...no trust, you find yourself wanting to kill yourself and wouldn't that be the ultimate betrayal.
Well said, Curmudgeon.
Is that where the thought : "the enemy of my enemy is my friend" comes from?
I should stay up until the wee hours more often -- you are interesting thought provokers! And, yes, that's where the quote comes from.
Maybe some early risers are like me: at 5:45AM I sit up and get up feeling good. If, for some reason, I roll over and go back to sleep, then, it is almost impossible to get cranked up and moving smoothly through the day.
Tried for eight straight the other night and it'll take a week to get the crink out of the middle of me back but it isn't a moral superiority issue at all. It is what it is.
Some magical nights are defined by the guy who, coming from the southwest, flies in a powerful sounding prop plane right over our house at exactly 2:13 AM. I never want to trade places but sometimes, it would be nice just to be him for a couple of hours.
oops! out of practice
Sun Tzu thought that all war is based on deception and life is perhaps a war of sorts. My wise partner, a Holocaust refugee, and successful entrepreneur said that humans often screw their friends because their enemies are watching them closely. People rationalize their betrayals because of the treachorous nature of them but betrayal may indeed be "the only truth that sticks". I would like to think I am not of this ilk but there is some metaphorical Judas in each of us I suspect. Therefore, I will be on guard not to betray others by first not betraying myself.
STONEY-- wonderful to see you--- what a treat on my first day of spring break!
TOMMYT-- very interesting & thought provoking post. I have a feeling I will be thinking about it as I go thru my day. I also wonder too, if your friend has a very unique take on betrayal because he was a Holocaust refugee?
Where is the line drawn between letting a friend down & betraying them?
It is a strange entanglement of life that the victim and the perpetrator share such a brutal dance. The spider and the fly caught in its web. The carnivore and its prey. One does not exist without the other. One wants to catch; one wants to flee. We are all caught up in the fascination, for excitement in life is often doing this dance to the brink of danger. The adrenalin junkie is tantalized to venture towards to this brink. The maximum rush is to come close but yet escape the danger. How sorry we feel for those who fail to break away from this tango, for those who fail to flee. Saddest are those who know it's too late for them to escape. And how sad we feel for those caught up in this entanglement, this web. For they really and truly wanted to get away. One's white knuckle experience is another's adventure. The betrayer and the betrayed do the life dance together, though they are not both willing partners.
"Love many; trust few; and always paddle your own canoe." Mary Alice Morrissey
This is a delicious subject to me, in the Sicilian sense of "Revenge being a dish best served cold". I've got a few betrayals in mind that I like to nurture, and keep their memory fresh and piquant.
I find that people who are capable of betraying someone lack (many things but foremost) a literary education in the ways of Fate. There are no traitors in literature who ever "win". By the end of the tale, something genuinely horrible has happened to them. In truth, reality is stranger than fiction. But traitors don't seem to know these things, or if they do they somehow exempt themselves - a form of hubris. A shame, since Fate exempts no one.
Thus it's really a matter of faith with me, that the short list of traitors who've earned my eternal contempt are now playing out their roles until we get to Act V. I have no doubts whatsoever, with no action on my part at all, that Fate will deliver the traitors to their well deserved end and that I will have a respectable seat in the gallery from which to observe. As Don Henley sang so well, "And the serpent's eyes shine".
Some of the most powerful scenes in literature and film come to us because of the dynamic of trust and betrayal. They are fascinating to read and to view, but terrible to live through in one's personal life.
I do sincerely hope that none of the riders on thesepia train are caught up in such turmoil in their lives.
For myself, I think that I go with that phrase, "Trust, but verify."
Off topic, can anyone here recommend some good "Steampunk" films or novels? I'm taking a writer's workshop on the genre in May, and I have enough graphic novels to comment on, but my list of books and films are a bit thin. I do have "The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen"... *thinks seriously about watching it tonight. Makes note to make plenty of popcorn*
back on topic : "If you stoop to conquer, you only conquer stupes"
JI-- yes, what goes around comes back around..... & you never know when , but you DO know it will. Even if the person is wracked w/ guilt that they can never shake off-- that's a form of hell in & of itself.
Yes, when it comes to planning the great revenge, do not make vast plans, with half vast ideas
LEARNED LESSON: Keep your friends close, but your enemies CLOSER.....
My "favorite" instance of betrayal is in "The Caine Mutiny," in which Fred MacMurray's Lt. Maryk twists his testimony in court so as not to side with his fellow officers, who committed mutiny against their top officer, Humphrey Bogart's demented Queeg. He gets the famous faceful of wine near the film's end.
I feel as if I have lived through this many times, with people who appear to be on my side about an important issue, only to be disappointed by them when they shy away from substantive action.
Betrayal always seems to come as a surprise; trust, in someone or something, being so complete that its violation is never considered to be a possibility. But I have found betrayal indicates that a certain level of complacency already existed in that relationship - by one side or the other, sometimes both. When betrayal happens, there is an underlying reason. It often doesn't make it any easier to accept, but the basis for that action or reaction was smoldering before it became a fire.
We can be tortured by betrayal; however the torment is much greater if we never allow ourselves to trust.
Travel Psychologist: I just read your fascinating post, especially since I plead guilty to being one of those persons referenced by you who cannot seem to resist the thrill of life in the fast lane, where I so often find my inner subliminal navigation compass taking me, like a moth to the flame. My explanation lies in one of my constant one line quotes, utilized to encourage people to reach for the stars, or at least die trying:
"This is your life, NOT merely a dress rehersal!"
The most awful thing about Betrayal, is that it always seems to come from a person or a Group that we least expect it from ... someone about whom we would never even to begin to imagine betrayal to be possible ... Disagreement, Dislike, Raging Hatred ... but never Betrayal ... Because we always give that person too much credit for having enough Self Respect to preclude any thought of Betrayal ....... It is difficult sometimes to decide which is the Bigger Dummy; The Betrayed, or the Betrayer ....... How cunning the demon of Betrayal is ... to leave the Betrayed stunned motionless for so long, as to allow the Damascene Blade of deceit not only to be thrust into the heart, but twisted thru and thru with agonizing completeness, leaving its victim unable to respond and his face painted in horrific disbelief ... THAT, is what we call REALLY getting screwed ....... The awful Result is, that it badly affects every other Relationship the victim has, or ever will have ... and life pretty generally goes down the toilet from there ....... Lesser Forms Kill Themselves ... I personally maintain that Life at its worst, is better than the alternative ... Every day, no matter how bad it is ... is one more chance to see my Children and Grandchildren, one more chance to make a difference somewhere ... Maintaining a Positive Attitude does not do one damned thing to lessen the crushing devastation of Betrayal ... but if one stays busy, he can forget for a little while .......
As I think about it, there are two forms of betrayal (at least!). In one a person breaks an explicit agreement; in the other the 'betrayed party' assumes an agreement exists when none was explicitly agreed to.... A wise man once said that contracts exist not to protect one against someone who cannot be trusted, but to keep people from misunderstanding (or misrembering) what they thought the agreement consisted of in the first place. I wonder how many marriages break up not because of malice, but simply due to crummy communications before 'the knot was tied'. Perhaps betrayal often consists in essentially 'nice people' assuming their fantasies are the other persons'. And when two folks project their wishes onto the other person, massive problems are sure to ensue. Betrayal or something else... it's sometimes hard to know, even for the parties involved....
I am unwilling to live without trust. Williams may have been right that dispensing with trust is our only defense against betrayal but I prefer to take the risk. Without trust, there can be no friendship, no family, no love, and no hope. That is a scenario that has no connection to human life. I am unwilling to live like that. I will bestow my trust where I think best and live like a human. If I am betrayed, I will learn my lesson from the individual. But I will not rescind my trust from everyone. Without my friends, my family, those I trust, I am not human. There is no point in mistrusting the air when there's nothing else to breathe.
OK ....... Thats ONE in favor of the Betrayed being the Dummy ... Not only the Dummy, but the Proximate Cause of the Betrayal .......
Just when you think you might have a handle on things, along comes JONATHON ISLES marching step for step with KING DAVID:
"Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over."
Never deposit in a bank 'too big to fail' and never engage in a relationship that you are unable to step away from with your you-ness intact.
To worry about betrayal, or anything else for that matter, is to give it power in your life and may in fact explain why the hot air balloon that is Sarah Palin has been borne aloft so long after it ought to have crumpled quietly to earth.
Now, because I have set a fox amongst the pigeons at an assisted living facility, I have some work to do. If you want to make a bunch of board members uneasy during a speaker phone conference, ask them to spell their names.
If life is the stage upon which the play is rehearsed and presented, actors portray themselves as well as those whose parts they play. A discerning member of the audience, a critic perhaps, notices the lack of barriers between the two entities and realizes, "Here is either genius or self-betrayal." It makes the character much more interesting to observe.
Jealousy and envy, I believe is at the heart of personal betrayl, but I always wondered what motivates someone to betray their country--ideology, greed, or. . . ?
....and when it is all said and done, how do we remember those individuals; the betrayed,as suffering,finally at peace. And the betrayer? by the larger than any other stone? After it is all done,and it was written in the 'big book' long before we were born, it is the memories, it is how many people's lives are/were better because of knowing the individual. Infamy is how the betrayer is remembered, but in fact, that the betrayer had relations that may have prospered; we watch the falcon eat the pigeon, but the falcon feeds its babies with that meal. The large picture is different from the angle at which it is viewed. Betrayal for no good reason is the thing we should most fear, I fear.
But DPR ....... what of Dr. Faust and Marguerite ??? Who was the Betrayer there ???
(Falstaff thinks it was Faust's Agent ...)
Natalie: The answer to your question is complicated, and involves knowing the complete history of the turncoat, the nature of the betrayal, and a full and accurate psychological profile of the defector. In the history of the American Clandestine Service, those that did America the most damage also ironically threw away their own career, professional reputation, and personal integrity....and they did so for "chump change." The recent motion picture "Breach" is fascinating, not just because the traitor evaded apprehension for so long, but because his payment was {relatively speaking} "chump change"..... The lesson for those that "police the police," therefore, is that every rogue lion is different......
Trust and faith in your fellow man/woman/person/animal of choice is a lot like love in that it is far better to have loved and lost than not to have loved at all. If my trust in someone is broken, or worse, betrayed.... I don't waste my time seeking revenge, but I will take whatever steps are necessary to not let it happen from the same source again while being careful not to throw out the baby with the bath water.
That's not to say that I don't have a cynical or skeptical streak in my makeup ‘cos I do indeed. I just always want to be certain that I use them as screens and filters and not as locked doors and closed windows. I like to welcome and enjoy the fresh, fragrant air of humanities sunny side.
...... but then again; there are those days that I'll dig a mote around myself...... but even on those occasions, the signs I have posted that warn of flesh-to-the-bone eating piranha are just a ruse.
Life, it's a good one don'tcha know....... Which is why thesepia train is equipped with bad intention sensors that won't allow any of them to board the train. The good news is that that they have never been triggered.
Peace out
cyn said...
I recommend the novel Embers by a little known author, Sandor Marai, for a superb story of betrayal (there is some tedious reading, but the "good parts" are well worth it).
Here is an excerpt:
"One would need to know why all this happened. And where the boundary lies between two people. The boundary of betrayal. . . . And also, where in all this my guilt lies" [p. 169].
Natalie asked, "I always wondered what motivates someone to betray their country--ideology, greed, or. . . ?" I'd suggest the root cause is simple indifference. If one feels no affiliation, loyalty, membership, participation, or commonality with something (be it nation or family), it's a very tiny step to placing one's whims and interests ahead of theirs. If this sounds strange, consider that many of us raise cattle, sheep, chickens, and pigs and give them tender, loving care. (Think 4-H Club for the kids, too...). Then one day we find ourselves dining on our 'friends'. Betrayal? Probably. A big deal to most of us? Nope. Our relationship to the animals in question was always predicated on a dichotomy: take good care of them; then kill and eat them. So too with our human family.... many have no ties to those among whom they live. Call these folks sociopaths (an accurate description, actually), but accept that their view exists. And it's a small jump for some folks... from 'friend' to 'victim'. The prisons are full of folks like this. And there are more outside the prisons than in them!